Did you know that almost 1 in 5 people experience anxiety a lot or all the time? That's pretty high, making it a very common disorder to have. I know many friends that experience anxiety, myself and partner included. I've not been officially diagnosed (because I'm too apprehensive to go.. ) but my partner Matt has. I'm not one to openly discuss these sorts of issues on my blog but I was contacted to see whether I would like to join in on Kalm's #LiveLifeReady campaign and I wanted to give it a go. I see tweets and comments on the daily relating to anxiety on my social media so I thought 'why not try and make an impact?' Perhaps you don't suffer from anxiety yourself but want to learn about how it is to deal with the issue and come up with coping mechanisms to help a friend or family member that does suffer themselves. No matter how big or small the impact is, I hope this post helps you all.
(Infographic from Kalms Lavender)
Anxiety VS Stress & The Symptoms
Anxiety VS Stress & The Symptoms
Just like any other illness, anxiety presents itself in many forms. It's important to remember that anxiety is different to stress and not to be confused with one another. Stress is defined as having too much expectations to what you can actually achieve. For example: The past few months I've been without a car, so I've needed to invest in a new one but I've been stressed because I've not been in the financial situation to do this. Anxiety on the other hand is the feeling of uneasiness and not knowing the outcome. For example: I am an anxious driver because I do not know what I will face or whether I'll get lost. I refuse to go somewhere without knowing the exact directions because I'm anxious I will get lost and something bad will occur due to this. Did you know that women are twice as likely to suffer from anxiety compared to men and research suggests it commonly affects most under 35.
Symptoms:
Physical effects Psychological effects
If you suffer from these symptoms then it's important to find coping mechanisms or chat to a GP as long term anxiety can impact quality of life, health and wellbeing.
General day to day life: I think it's safe to say that Matt and I both experience the same sort of anxiety on a day to day basis. Sometimes we just don't feel like leaving the house, not because we're lazy(!) but it is the fear of the unknown and the thought of being in situations we're not prepared for. Other days we can cope and go outside without too much of a worry and feel like we have our anxiety under control.
Night-life: Being 21 we do love to go out and have a few drinks and simply enjoy ourselves just like you'd expect any young adult to do. Anxiety however really can play with this and can turn a fun night into something much less. We feel like we can't go out as just a couple because our social anxiety of others decides to make us both paranoid of the unknown. Matt frequently doesn't want to leave me alone in the fear of someone coming up to me and making me uncomfortable and uneasy. Likewise, for him to come back to someone acting untoward makes his anxiety sky rocket. It's not a pleasant situation and often results in us just not enjoying ourselves and wondering why we even bothered!!
Work: 70% of young men's work performance & relationships are affected by anxiety. I spoke to Matt about this as I was keen to get him to open up about how this can impact his work life and discovered that when he started his bar job he was working as promo staff which involved going around the town and speaking to complete strangers about the business and convincing them to spend their money there. There were days when he felt confident and cracked on with the task ahead, yet other days his anxiety got the better of him. He'd get anxiety induced migraines from overthinking about what he'd be faced with and he'd call in sick on the days he just really couldn't cope. Everything he described really took me back to my school days where I would always wake up feeling like he described. I've been quite lucky that I've not had a job that's really spurred on any anxious feelings but I can completely relate to his situation.
Relationships: Being an anxious couple has it's pros and cons. We understand each other and know how to help one another but we do also face our difficulties. Arguments are completely normal in relationships but we find that if we argue then we really struggle to talk it through which makes the situation worse. We sit there in silence overthinking the situation, thinking that if we say what's on our mind then there's the chance we'll lose that person in our lives. There's been times when it's been about something so silly (like wanting the other just to help them out a bit more with cooking or cleaning) and the situation has been made so much worse due to our anxiety and we've not spoken. Yet when we finally get the courage to talk it through, it's resolved in minutes and we're fine again! It definitely causes unnecessary stress to both of us and it's something we are working on.
Symptoms:
Physical effects Psychological effects
- Headaches
- Stomach upsets
- Nausea
- Racing heartbeat
- Sweating
- Dry mouth
- Muscle tension
- Dread
- Fear of losing control
- Restlessness
- Insomnia
- Poor concentration
- Agitation
.. and of course there are many more but these are the most common.
This animation from Kalm's Lavendar is a great way to see the symptoms in video form
This animation from Kalm's Lavendar is a great way to see the symptoms in video form
If you suffer from these symptoms then it's important to find coping mechanisms or chat to a GP as long term anxiety can impact quality of life, health and wellbeing.
Personal Experiences & The Impacts
I feel like male anxiety is often looked past but 80% of young men find that their anxiety affects their social life, so why should it be any different? I've decided to talk about both myself and Matt's experience with anxiety so you can see just how differently it affects us and how it can impact our relationships and careers. General day to day life: I think it's safe to say that Matt and I both experience the same sort of anxiety on a day to day basis. Sometimes we just don't feel like leaving the house, not because we're lazy(!) but it is the fear of the unknown and the thought of being in situations we're not prepared for. Other days we can cope and go outside without too much of a worry and feel like we have our anxiety under control.
Night-life: Being 21 we do love to go out and have a few drinks and simply enjoy ourselves just like you'd expect any young adult to do. Anxiety however really can play with this and can turn a fun night into something much less. We feel like we can't go out as just a couple because our social anxiety of others decides to make us both paranoid of the unknown. Matt frequently doesn't want to leave me alone in the fear of someone coming up to me and making me uncomfortable and uneasy. Likewise, for him to come back to someone acting untoward makes his anxiety sky rocket. It's not a pleasant situation and often results in us just not enjoying ourselves and wondering why we even bothered!!
Work: 70% of young men's work performance & relationships are affected by anxiety. I spoke to Matt about this as I was keen to get him to open up about how this can impact his work life and discovered that when he started his bar job he was working as promo staff which involved going around the town and speaking to complete strangers about the business and convincing them to spend their money there. There were days when he felt confident and cracked on with the task ahead, yet other days his anxiety got the better of him. He'd get anxiety induced migraines from overthinking about what he'd be faced with and he'd call in sick on the days he just really couldn't cope. Everything he described really took me back to my school days where I would always wake up feeling like he described. I've been quite lucky that I've not had a job that's really spurred on any anxious feelings but I can completely relate to his situation.
Relationships: Being an anxious couple has it's pros and cons. We understand each other and know how to help one another but we do also face our difficulties. Arguments are completely normal in relationships but we find that if we argue then we really struggle to talk it through which makes the situation worse. We sit there in silence overthinking the situation, thinking that if we say what's on our mind then there's the chance we'll lose that person in our lives. There's been times when it's been about something so silly (like wanting the other just to help them out a bit more with cooking or cleaning) and the situation has been made so much worse due to our anxiety and we've not spoken. Yet when we finally get the courage to talk it through, it's resolved in minutes and we're fine again! It definitely causes unnecessary stress to both of us and it's something we are working on.
Coping Mechanisms
We both spoke about our coping mechanisms and said we don't think that we can truly overcome anxiety 100% but there are definitely ways to cope and make the low days better.
Positivity and taking a moment to reflect: It sounds a little silly but staying positive and thinking of happy thoughts can sometimes be the way forward. It really spurs confidence in us and allows us to relax that little bit to enjoy ourselves and the day ahead. Taking the time to enjoy every small moment in the day can be really beneficial, even if it's enjoying breakfast together or a hug.
Communication: Talking can be very difficult when you're anxious and we both struggle with that as I mentioned above but opening up to a trusted loved one can really take a weight off your shoulders. Talking about your worries out loud can often make them seem a lot less daunting and put them into perspective.
Write it all down: Something new we have both tried is jotting down our thoughts in a journal. This is a great way to offload your worries and thoughts again, especially if there's no one to talk to at the time.
Medicines: During my driving I would take some herbal pastilles that help to relieve anxiety and worry. It's a natural remedy which I was willing to try and it definitely helped me cope a lot better. Kalm's have actually just released their Lavender One-A-Day capsules that are a temporary relief for mild anxiety. If you've not tried a remedy like these then I highly suggest looking into them as they aren't harmful and are proven to help.
Anxiety is definitely being spoken about more and there are many helpful resources coming out on how to cope with it. I'm really happy to see a lot more people understanding the issue and responding positively. I hope this post has been insightful and perhaps allowed you to get to know myself a little better as it's something I don't usually speak about.
Do you suffer from anxiety? Maybe you have some coping mechanisms yourself to suggest? Leave them down below!
- Emily x
* This post was sponsored but all opinions are my own.
Positivity and taking a moment to reflect: It sounds a little silly but staying positive and thinking of happy thoughts can sometimes be the way forward. It really spurs confidence in us and allows us to relax that little bit to enjoy ourselves and the day ahead. Taking the time to enjoy every small moment in the day can be really beneficial, even if it's enjoying breakfast together or a hug.
Communication: Talking can be very difficult when you're anxious and we both struggle with that as I mentioned above but opening up to a trusted loved one can really take a weight off your shoulders. Talking about your worries out loud can often make them seem a lot less daunting and put them into perspective.
Write it all down: Something new we have both tried is jotting down our thoughts in a journal. This is a great way to offload your worries and thoughts again, especially if there's no one to talk to at the time.
Medicines: During my driving I would take some herbal pastilles that help to relieve anxiety and worry. It's a natural remedy which I was willing to try and it definitely helped me cope a lot better. Kalm's have actually just released their Lavender One-A-Day capsules that are a temporary relief for mild anxiety. If you've not tried a remedy like these then I highly suggest looking into them as they aren't harmful and are proven to help.
Anxiety is definitely being spoken about more and there are many helpful resources coming out on how to cope with it. I'm really happy to see a lot more people understanding the issue and responding positively. I hope this post has been insightful and perhaps allowed you to get to know myself a little better as it's something I don't usually speak about.
Do you suffer from anxiety? Maybe you have some coping mechanisms yourself to suggest? Leave them down below!
- Emily x
* This post was sponsored but all opinions are my own.
